Man, oh man. In this day and age it’s hard not to feel crushing sadness or pain or depression sometimes. We are surrounded by the influence of social media, the darkness of the news, and the ever-increasing mental illnesses. But that doesn’t mean we have to let it all consume us.
I’ve been going through a rough patch lately and was too far down in the slumps, but I took steps to improve my mood and mindset. These steps continually helps me to be happy with myself and grateful for my situation no matter how bad I think it may be.
Hopefully you can try some of these tips and they work for you as they did for me.
But remember, if they don’t work, then THAT’S OKAY. If they only work for a minute, that’s okay too. There’s nothing wrong with you and you WILL overcome your obstacles again and again and again. Also. YOU’RE NOT ALONE. YOU ARE LOVED.
XO – Alex
- Wake up and go on a walk. Seriously, there’s something about fresh air and sunshine right when you wake up that reminds you of the beauty and simplicity of life. My favorite thing to do is roll out of bed and take my dog on a walk or brew a cup of coffee and take a short little spin around the neighborhood. Give it a try and see just how much the simple act will strengthen your mood.
- Talk to a close friend. Find that friend that has always been there for you. (In this moment, don’t talk to friends you only party with or that friend you’re secretly in love with, or the friend with the big mouth.) Talk to the person that is a constant in your life. Best friend, sister, mom—or if you don’t feel close enough with anyone, find likeminded people on the internet (social media isn’t always bad, it helps us all to connect), leave a comment down below and make friends. There is always someone you can lean on for a moment when it seems too much to handle on your own.
- Turn on an uplifting movie or read an inspirational book. Sometimes it’s 4 in the morning and you have nobody to talk to. Work on being comfortable with yourself. Do this by committing all of your attention to a movie or book that will make you feel good. Put down your phone, quit scrolling, quit playing that game or stalking that ex and just let the messages of the movie or book fill you up. (I have a few posts about good movies to watch when your sad. Here and here and here.)
- Silence your phone. Put. It. Away. Your phone, your need for communication/attention, your scrolling on social media (sometimes it’s all great) needs to go for a while. When you’re trying to heal and trying to find a safe space to figure out your thoughts, your phone isn’t going to help you. I put my phone in the next room and take a relaxing bath. Sure, my brain thinks, “Oh my gosh, what if he texted me,” or “Wait, I have to check up on my book blog,” or, “Did I just hear a notification?” It’s the same thing I said in #3: Find comfort in being alone—in being with yourself.
- Accept it. Cry it out for a moment. Accept that you’re sad. Find what’s making you sad. Bad friends? Cut them out no matter how hard it may be. Chasing after a guy that doesn’t want you? Tell him goodbye. Your job? Hey, maybe it’s time to find a new one or change your perspective while you’re at work. Money problems? You will always find a way to make money, you will always lose money. Money problems will always be there, but not your happiness. Focus on your happiness. Accept that in order to heal you might have to do some hard things. Think it through, think out ways to make yourself happier—but don’t overthink, don’t let it consume you. Get to the root of the problem and fix it in the healthiest way you know how.
- Journal. Journal, journal, journal. Write about your thoughts. Write down things you’re grateful for. Put your feelings into a poem. Make your life story into a novel or short story. Draw a beautiful picture. Color a mandala. Make yourself a vision/dream board. Journaling doesn’t just have to be sitting down and saying, “Dear Diary…” There are so many ways to channel your creativity and your emotions and put them onto paper. It’s like taking your sadness and your fears and casting them away onto a physical object. Your thoughts no longer have to consume you because now it’s on something tangible that you can see and feel and throw away if you need to.
- Go on a solo adventure. When I’m having a hard day, I go discover a new coffee shop or bookstore. Go shopping alone. Go to the bar alone. Go grab dinner by yourself. Just because you feel sad or lonely or depressed doesn’t mean you can’t continue living your life how you want to.
- Plan a social event. By social event I mean a girls’/boys’ night out, or lunch with your grandma, or a get together with an old friend. Socializing and listening to other people’s lives and problems is a way to put your own life into perspective and realize we all have problems that we are all facing in our own way. It’s a way to remind you that there’s hope for happiness, that there are people that care, and that your life won’t forever be as bad as it is now. And that YOU ARE LOVED.
- Be Active. Go to the gym, pound it out on the treadmill or lift some weights and let the natural endorphins change your mood. Go explore nature on a hike. Ride your bike up the nearest hill. Take a yoga class, hip-hop dance class, twerk it out, etc. I know sometimes it’s hard to have the motivation to do anything, but all it takes is forcing one foot out the door and you’ll realize the difference physical activity makes.
- Change your mindset. I know this is easier said than done. I have depression and sometimes it absolutely consumes me. But take a step back and realize the power your mind has. Say to yourself, “What I’m feeling is valid, but my negative thoughts aren’t helping.” Just conscientiously changing your thinking from negative to positive can make such an impact on your bad mood/sad day/depressing moment/etc. I’m going through a rough time right now and when it all gets to be too much I think of the positive things in my life. Or if I have silly thoughts like, “They’re judging me,” or “My friends don’t love me as much as I love them,” or “That boy I like will never like me back…” Instead, realize that your thoughts might not be true, and if they are true you will move on and find happiness…and always have faith in yourself. Don’t be consumed by things you can’t change. You CAN change your thoughts.
MUCH LOVE.
❤️❤️